A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Q. What do women and Google have in common?
A. They both can’t ever let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.
The following conversation took place between a wife and husband after a lottery win.
Husband: If I won the lottery what would you do?
Wife: I’d divorce you and take half the money.
Husband: Ok, well I just won $10, here’s $5 now f*ck off!!
Wife: I’d divorce you and take half the money.
Husband: Ok, well I just won $10, here’s $5 now f*ck off!!
