WHAT HE FIND'S ATTRACTIVE IN YOU

Eavesdrop on any pre-date pep talk, and you'll probably hear the typical woman-to-woman dating advice: Play it cool, do your hair like this—and whatever you do, don't wear that. But while those traditional tips aren't necessarily wrong, there are other, way more important traits that research shows men find attractive

Eavesdrop on any pre-date pep talk, and you'll probably hear the typical woman-to-woman dating advice: Play it cool, do your hair like this—and whatever you do, don't wear that. But while those traditional tips aren't necessarily wrong, there are other, way more important traits that research shows men find attractive—and they have nothing to do with your physical appearance.The problem: Traditional dating advice has been leading us on a wild goose chase, one that leads away from the possibility of real, healthy love, says Ken Page, the author of Deeper Dating. Relationships are built on authenticity and connection, he explains. And if you're constantly on edge, playing hard to get, and worrying about your appearance, you're not going to be taking advantage of the science-backed traits that really attract love and intimacy. And the best news? You probably already have them.

1. She’s passionate about something. Anything.

 

When a woman has a passion you can do so many more special things for her. Flowers are great, Having a passion gives both of you something to share and learn about with each other. If her hobby is watching Netflix there’s not much you can do other than watch TV with her or get her a 3-month subscription gift card, guys finds this very attractive

2. A sense of humor

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You don’t have to be a stand-up comic, but there are few things more attractive than a woman that can make you laugh. Plus, being able to watch smart, non-network television comedies together is the best.

3. She’s decisive

 

 

 

 

 

There’s a big difference between being pushy and being decisive. Decisive means you can make a decision and stand by it. You know what you want and you’re willing to go for it. Decisive doesn’t mean you stop speaking for three days if you both don’t want to go to Wendy’s, but if there’s a goal you have, you’ll do whatever it takes to make sure you reach it. Again, you could say the same thing about a guy, but I’ve never dated a guy so I don’t know what to look for in them.

4. Appreciate little things

 

 

 

 

 

 

One time I was dating a girl and while we were talking on the phone she mentioned that she absolutely loved getting new socks. The next time we went out I picked her up and there was a nicely-wrapped present in the seat. She opened it and saw that it was a cute pair of socks. She looked confused and asked me why I bought them. I was a little taken back and said, “Oh I just remembered the other night you said you always loved getting them.” She kind of shrugged and stuffed them into her purse. I know it wasn’t a big, elaborate gift, but it’s always nice to be with someone who appreciates the little things.

5. Kindness

 

 

 

 

 

It doesn’t matter how beautiful you are, if you’re mean, it’s the worst. Someone who’s kind to those that can’t benefit them is admirable. Plus, if she’s kind to your family they’ll love her forever. That makes life so much easier. The most important characteristic is also the most basic, Page says. One major study asked 10,000 men and women what quality they find most important in a mate. The number one response across the board? Kindness. The problem? "No articles are giving advice on how to be 'nice,' even though we'd all be so much better off simply being kind rather than spending hours in front of the mirror," says Page. And it doesn't take a lot to demonstrate these traits. Small acts of kindness, like being on time, letting the other person order first and choose where to sit, and being polite to the server, are clear ways to show consideration.

  6. You're Honest

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Can't lie for the life of you? That's a good thing when it comes to love. For one, research has shown men are more sensitive to sexual infidelity than women (likely for evolutionary reasons—they want to be sure their offspring is actually theirs!) and are more likely to end a relationship after a partner is unfaithful than women.  And it's not like you needed another reason, to be honest. but research finds that perceived honesty affects judgments of physical attractiveness as well, Nicholson says. In the study, participants deemed "honest" people as more fit, healthy, and kind.

7. You Fight Right

 

 

 

 

No matter how perfect your relationship is, fights happen. But there are four fighting styles, known in psychology as the four horsemen of divorce, which signal a relationship is doomed, says Sean Horan, Ph.D., a professor at Texas State University. They are: criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling, or becoming non-responsive—the most damaging behavior of all, research shows. When fighting, remember that you care about each other and that you have the same goals, Horan says. And don't shut your S.O. out. Talk about the issue, watch your words, and try to use "I" statements ("I feel disregarded when you're late to events") rather than blaming "you" statements ("You are never on time!").

 8. You Like Your "You Time"

 

 

 

 

 

"I like to think of it this way: I love eating cake, but I can't eat it 24/7," Horan says. It's the same with a relationship: Of course, you like being with the person, but you can't be with him all the time. "As humans, there's a tug between being autonomous and bonding with others." Both are equally important: You need to maintain your independence when you become part of a couple, and the same goes for your partner. Plus, in today's society, we've become more reliant on our partners to meet basically all of our needs, says Page. "This is actually a dangerous thing, as we're all human and limited in our ways." That's why it's important to have a circle of friends, especially one that supports you as a couple. Bottom line: Keep up your yoga-and-brunch dates with the girls, and encourage him to hang out with the guys. (Your "you time" is actually one of the 

  9. You're Positive

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beauty really is more than skin deep. Research shows that positive personality traits can impact perceptions of physical attractiveness, Nicholson says. It may not be groundbreaking, but men are indeed attracted to pleasant, positive, and cheerful personalities in women, he explains. These positive personality traits are associated not only with higher physical attraction but also social attraction—a key factor in choosing a long-term partner. This isn't to say you need to put on a happy face 24/7, but if you focus on being friendly, and are open to meeting new people, it's a win-win.

10. She’s cool around your friends

 

 

 

 

 

 

She doesn’t have to be a bro and a chugging a beer with all the guys, but if she gets along with your friends and they become her friends as well, it’s a beautiful thing. Obviously, it should go both ways, as he should get along with her friends as well, but for a guy, it means so much to be with a woman that’s not just your partner, but also one of your friends.

12. Happiness

 

No one is going to be happy all the time, but if every time you have a drink you start crying and talking about your first boyfriend it’s not very fun. Be happy with what you have and where you are in life. Not satisfied and complacent, but happy. Plus, you’ll never get one of those awful dudes that walk up to strange girls at the bar and says, “Aw, why aren’t you smiling?” Stop it you creeps.

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WHAT'S WRONG WITH CHRISTAIN-MUSLIM RELATIONSHIP?

WHAT'S WRONG WITH CHRISTIAN-MUSLIM RELATIONSHIP?

Inter-religious marriages are very rare and some people really detest it. But come to think of it, would you consider religion as a determinant for marriage. I mean, it was not his/her fault to be born into a christian/Muslim home in the first place, That aside, after marriage, how would you share your religion between your children?,....Leave your comments

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THINGS TO CONSIDER BEFORE PROPOSING

THINGS YOU NEED TO CONSIDER BEFORE PROPOSING

You’ve met the love of your life and you’re thinking about popping the question. It’s an exciting time, but a nerve-racking one too! Marriage is a big commitment and all anybody wants to hear when the time comes to get down on one knee is “Yes”.

But, before you get carried away, here are a few things to consider to make sure you’re both ready for the next step:

1. Have you had the marriage chat?

The chances are that it’s come up at some point – it’s hard to avoid the subject with friends tying the knot, proposals documented on social media, and endless TV shows about all things weddings. But has your partner said explicitly that they would like to get married?

“There’s a risk when you’ve met the man or woman of your dreams that you can get overexcited and project your own desires onto them.”

You want to show the world your love with a wedding, but they might not see nuptials as the way to demonstrate their commitment. They may wish to stay in a relationship in the long term, but not want the formalities of marriage.

Be sure you know they feel the same way about it as you do, to make sure you’ll get the response you’re looking for.

2. Do you know enough about each other?

For most people, the days of having to wait until you’re married to move in together and really get to know one another are over. Nowadays people tend to put their relationship to the test before saying “I do” to give themselves the best chance of a long and happy life together. And it’s no bad thing.

You learn a lot about a person when you move in. Think back to any housemates you had at university, or living with your siblings at home. Everybody has their habits and foibles so you need to know you can put up with them, and that they’re OK with yours too.

Have you taken a holiday as a couple yet? Because that teaches you even more about each other. Time away just the two of you, with travel hurdles to jump and unknown cities, towns, and beaches to explore really opens your eyes to each other’s personalities. And it gives you a nice chunk of time to chat properly too – without the distraction of work or friends or whose turn it is to empty the dishwasher at home.

“Every relationship should face a crisis or two before anybody starts planning a wedding.”

Seeing each other at your lowest, or having to tackle a difficult situation together will test just how strong you are – and how good you are at being supportive through tricky times.

Everybody wants to marry somebody who’s their best friend, and you only give that title to somebody you know inside out.

3. Where are you in your lives?

Are there things you’ve said you’d like to do before you get married? Do you want to buy a property together first? Or would you like to do some traveling and then settle down? Or are there career milestones you want to achieve before tying the knot? Do you know what kind of wedding you’d both want? Do you have enough money for that at the moment?

Of course, you don’t have to get married straight away – you could enjoy a long engagement before any kind of ceremony takes place. You just need to make sure you both know what you want. You don’t have to know every detail, just that your lives are broadly heading in the same direction.

4. Do you know where you both stand on the big life issues?

Life will bring enough surprises you can’t control, so try to avoid letting what you want coming out of the blue too. Have you talked about whether you want to have children? Or if you have ambitions to go and live overseas? Or if you have career aspirations that would mean a significant change to your lifestyle?

If you have conflicting aspirations, you’ll need to have a serious conversation before committing to spending your life together. Otherwise, you might find that further down the line you’re having to compromise on something you don’t want to give up.

When you know where you stand on all of these points, you’re ready to start planning that proposal! Make sure that you want the same things and that you’re giving your relationship the best chance of success, then you can focus on how you’re going to ask that all important question and bring about one of the most exciting moments of your lives.

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A GIRL YOU DONT KNOW

This is the story of a girl you know...
A girl like you...A girl like me...
A girl in the back pew of the old church,
A girl lurking around the corner, hoping and wishing to be seen...
A girl without a voice.
The one who wants for the sun...Her sun.
She hopes that someday it'll shine again...if at all it did shine.
The girl without a home to call her own but will gladly scrub your floors to make her bed.
The girls whose heart and might is in her daily chores but won't mind to sparing a thought for her dreams.
The girl who stares at you in admiration hoping that someday she'll be deserving of the things you own...well, not all of them.
The girl who gets a scar or more for every of her mistakes.
Don't you know that she'll love to look beautiful too?
If she can't be beautiful, should she be deprived of her sleep?
She has not asked for more sleeping hours, all she pleads for is that your young ravaging male doesn't find her a prey for his kingdom...
She cries as her mind and body are violated with increasing power for the mighty.
She tries to wash the pain away but can the smear of her heart be erased?
Words bear down on her heavily, yes...they hurt.
The sticks might not have broken her bones but the words have damaged her soul.
Is this girl even allowed to dream?
Maybe she wasn't spared a thought for her dreams after all...
Maybe it was a silent prayer from the depth of her hollow heart,
A prayer to God that he should take her away...
Maybe he would hear her someday...one day.
This is the story of a girl...
...a girl you know.

Kindly share

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SHE WAS TIRED OF BEIGN USED

 

She was tired of being used. Every single night it was the same thing. After a long day of flirting with other women and paying her no mind, he would send a text around nine to ask if he could come through. She knew it wasn't going to be one of those romantic dreams where her Superman would knock on the door with flowers behind his back and bags of groceries to cook dinner in the kitchen as she relaxed after a long day. It was the other way around. She was the groceries and he looked at her like a fast food drive-thru to come through and vanish. And the worst part about it, he even made it quick. She kept contemplating back and forth on what her response would be until temptation squeezed her like a lemon and took hold of her fingers to reply, "I'll see you when you get here" He comes through, as usual , talking the same old shit with no mental stimulation or substance just thoughts on when he can get her to the bed for some physical penetration. No talks about the future or a serious relationship, just a few simple strokes for two minutes because he never paces it. As he grabbed her hand and began walking her to the room she came to her senses and realized she was done. She was done cohabiting with a man who wants nothing more so she forced him out and slammed the door leaving nothing but his hands grasping her panties because he can't let go. And that's when she realized her vagina is the most valuable thing in the world and it was time to let go of a man who didn't deserve it.

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